DISCLAIMER: The author of this post is not an expert in parenting and only intends to share her learnings as a mother till date. The lessons learnt are subject to alteration based on her experiences in the coming years. The author cannot be held responsible for the same.
Motherhood, the most divine status bestowed upon a woman, transforms her and takes her into a roller coaster ride, hiding and revealing all that was unknown to her. This is my story of it and and I guess most of us do have something in common to agree with it.
Efforts vs results: The baby is born and like most of the mothers, I beam with pride and joy to see the little one sleeping peacefully. Not for long, though. Baby girl had taken amniotic fluid and had to be under the doctor's supervision for 24 hours. When she arrives with an injected wrist, the tiny hand with bandaid as she was fed through it for a day, my hear sinks and tears roll down the cheeks. She is fine for now. Evening becomes night and now starts the journey of motherhood!
She screams, cries, nobody knows why. I feed her and sway her but she whines the moment I let hold of her. Time I took up the challenge. I , mother of X, swear that I would strive hard to be the best mother on earth. The sacrifices begin. Sleep, food, clothing all adapted to suit her needs. Still she cries. Neighbors and family members curse the mother for not looking after the child properly. Doctor simply call her ' colic baby' . Now, why isn't my research on parenting all these months, helping me solve this issue? As months pass by, the child calms down. Too many methods adopted making it difficult to name one that attributed to the solving of the problem.
I can see the child's growth and development being directly proportional to my efforts. I put in more efforts hoping for better results, and I did get it until she was 12 months. I had one more challenge. As a kid being a poor and fussy eater myself , I had decided to do all that I could to ensure that she was NOT like me. I wanted to see her as the ideal chubby Amul baby of yesteryear and not the skinny barbie girl! The day she learnt to say 'NO', the results began declining. I tried hard, all shortcuts but the results were short-lived. Later I realized my mistake and the takeaway being:
THE CHILD IS NOT AN INANIMATE OBJECT WHICH CAN BE MANIPULATED TO PRODUCE RESULTS.
Yes, like us, they had a body and a mind of their own. And their food habits are influenced by the parents habits both consciously and unconsciously. If I donot eat apple, I may not buy it often, and consecutively when the child is offered it once in a while, she may refuse it. "She is always a fussy eater. Never eats fruits".We conveniently reason it out. However, the child might love bananas, and will demand one everyday. This doesnot mean that we need not try feeding the child with all possible healthy options. Try your best even if the result is not proportional to the efforts. My eating habits changed when I grew up and all the health benefits my mother had listed with each food was remembered and followed (a few permanently deleted from memory:).
Believe me, you never know when your words would strike the right chord but they will fetch you results some day.